Carpet Jurisdiction Aphorisms

The jurisdiction of the mandate ends exactly at the brass threshold strip. We stand on the industrial tile to formally disagree.

We installed plush carpeting in the review room to muffle the sound of systemic complaints. The acoustics of the silence are now fully compliant.

The thickness of the underlayment determines the weight of the policy. We cannot enforce a ruling issued from a room with polished concrete.

When executive changes are proposed, we roll out the woven runner. The width of the fabric dictates the exact boundaries of the new ideas.

The compliance violation was mitigated by retroactively incinerating the architectural blueprints. A structure cannot be found non-compliant if we possess no record of its intended shape.

We achieved absolute security by quarantining the theoretical threat within a restricted binder. The risk is now perfectly contained between two heavily reinforced plastic covers.

When the inspector noted a severe structural deviation, the committee swiftly voted to abolish the inspector’s department. The structural deviation immediately ceased to be an official concern.